So along came Ruaridh and Struan just after 11am on the 15th August. Ruaridh entered the world crying and Struan quiet until he was taken through to see the paediatrician. They were fine and thankfully didn’t have to spend any time in special care. They were popped onto my chest for a bit skin to skin. They were tiny. 4lb 7oz and 4lb 11oz. I have started to write this at week 14 so some details might be a big vague. I felt awful after the section, my blood pressure had dropped so I was feeling sick during and after. My throat was so dry I couldn’t even enjoy the toast! I honestly can’t remember much of what happened that first day, I just remember being thirsty and feeling sick.

The midwifes had asked how I planned to feed the boys – breastfeed. How I had planned all along, despite many people making the assumption I wouldn’t with twins. The midwife also advised giving them a top up of formula. I was still so much in shock from the days events I didn’t really question it. But I do now. They said it was because they were so small they didn’t want them to lose weight. But if breastmilk is all a baby needs and your body is designed to make as much as your baby needs, why wasn’t it enough? I’ll never know if they would have lost a lot of weight not giving them a formula top up but they thrived that first week so I won’t question it too much.

My parents and Doug’s mum came to visit that first night. We were delighted to be able to share the news.

I always thought it would be cool to have twins. Imagine the surprise at the 12 weeks scan, the dead pan face of the sonographer saying she had a surprise for us. Two. And then to go on to say she would check if there are any more! Only two, phew. I had thought that despite not putting on any weight, my clothes were getting a bit tight round the middle at only 12 weeks. The thought of twins fluttered in my mind. Although Doug said of course I would say that in hindsight.

I had a trouble free pregnancy. A midwife had poured it my blood pressure was slightly high at my 12 week scan. I had just been told I was expecting twins! Other than a bit of heartburn, being slightly uncomfy at night, many a night time trip to the bathroom, oh and a “flu like illness”, I was very healthy. I jested with my morning (but all day) sickness laden friend that she would get an easy baby whereas I would have more of a challenge (she hasn’t got off that lightly).

Doug worked extremely hard to get the house in order for the two bundles due to arrive. Who would have thought it would take a pregnancy to eventually get a carpet on the stairs? Many a late night he was up varnishing, nailing, sawing. The neighbours must have loved us. Just prepping them for noise to be heard through the walls in a few months time. It wasn’t all finished but of course, Doug was going to have plenty time to finish it all off when he was on “holiday”.

I read up about raising twins, breastfeeding twins and we even attending a practical parenthood class run by TAMBA (twins and multiple birth association). Thinking I was prepared for this (and not sticking my head in the sand, like I know better now), and after the last few meals out as a family of 2, I was booked in for induction. The plan was to have a natural (vaginal-yep both ways are natural) The induction didn’t work, not even a slight movement, these two were cosy and comfy. The next part of the plan was to give me more hormones to hopefully bring on labour. Their heartbeats were monitored and unfortunately Struan’s heartbeat dropped a couple of times so they recommended a c-section. Anyone expecting twins- be prepared for this. It went from the midwife going to run it by her senior to having about 10 people in the room from all specialities. I didn’t expect it all to happen so soon. I was so overwhelming, I cried. I’m quite a hard ass as well, I don’t really cry. So off we were whipped into theatre, and Ruaridh and Struan entered the world. I have to admit, it was pretty seamless and from the stories I’ve heard about vaginal births, I did alright!

This site will mainly be about my ups and downs when raising my two boys. I’ll give you a little preview of my life prior to the 15th August.

I grew up in a little town on the east coast of Fife (that’s the east coast, not East Neuk, I’m not trying to cut above my station!). I had a fantastic upbringing curtesy of two loving parents and extended family. I have a sister 6 years my elder. My life was pretty uneventful. That makes it sound as if it were boring, it wasn’t, it’s just that I had no worries outside “what I wanted for my lunch”. Piece on jam, always.

At 16, I met my sole mate, my rock, and the person I now call my husband. We have now been together for 14 years almost, married since 2015. We have enjoyed our independence, going on holidays, eating out, walking and cycling when we felt like it. We bought our first home when I was 21 and moved to a bigger house when I was 25 and we’re still here. Our first family addition was our cat, Tiger.  I remember thinking raising a kitten was hard work. I chuckle thinking back to then.

I went to uni, got a 2:1 in Business Management and got a job as a secretary in the NHS, in hopes that one day I’d be chief executive. I’m now an Assistant Practice Manager in a GP Practice in the North East of Fife. One day I hope to manage my own practice but just now I’ll concentrate on my family. Plus, I work in an awesome practice with the best colleagues. Who would want to leave somewhere where you laugh daily and your office is next to the biscuit cupboard?